Reece Shearsmith's Haunted House

During the first part of Reece Shearsmith's Haunted House for BBC Radio 4, Ghostwatch was given a much-appreciated mention by the esteemed panel (made up of Reece, Mark Gatiss, Vic Reeves and Yvette Fielding).

As the programme is only currently available for a limited period on the BBC iPlayer, here is a transcript:

REECE: A famous bard once wrote, "there are more things in Heaven and Earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy". Maybe the BBC had this is mind when they, in 1992, presented, Ghostwatch - a wonderful, postmodern ghost story which has come to be known as a kind of hoax akin to Orson Welles' famous, War of the Worlds broadcast in 1938. It was a wonderfully produced documentary with all the trappings and the tropes of a live broadcast. Ghostwatch used a familiar cast of television presenters and it begins like this knockabout television investigation into the most haunted house in Britain, however before long, things start to go a bit wrong. 


REECE: So, who remembers that when it went out? Does anyone have any memories of it?

MARK: Parky - brilliant.

REECE: Yeah, brilliant actor in it! So real.

YVETTE: He was fantastic, wasn't he?

REECE: He was the thing that made it--made you question whether it was real or not.

MARK: The genius of that, I think - it's kind of uneven - there's some brilliant things in it, but the absolute copper-bottomed genius is that the ghost is called, 'Pipes'.



MARK: 'Pipes' - it's so brilliant! And it's 'cause he lives in the--they think it comes from the cupboard under the stairs, and it makes a banging sound.

REECE: They think he's in the radiator...

MARK: 'Pipes' - that's a real ghost name if ever there was.

YVETTE: But there was huge controversy about that programme - massive.

REEVES: I've never heard of it.

REECE: Did you not see it when it went out?

REEVES: Never, no.

YVETTE: I didn't see it when it went out, either, no.

REEVES: I never heard of it.

MARK: Oh, it's good.

REECE: Have you seen it now..?

REEVES: I've heard of... Parky.


MARK: He's not real..!